◈ THE INCIDENT · FIELD CERTIFIED · EAST BAY CA · 925
I was walking past these Teslas.
Kobe mechanics.
Optimal body form.
Moving through space correctly.
The charger fell out.
That's it.
That's the whole incident.
A charging cable.
Disconnected.
From a car that wasn't moving.
He was scared shitless.
5'6".
5'nothing.
Standard Tesla owner.
Got in my face.
Then ran off.
I apologized.
Was respectful.
Until he got in my face.
At which point I said:
"Don't make me call yo mama."
elon can't protect him either.
◈ KENSHOTEK FIELD EVIDENCE · CERTIFIED · 925
He tried to claim damage.
Frame damage.
Said the car was salvaged.
For a charger
that fell out.
For the record:
I would have plugged it back in.
"My bad, bro."
Done. Ten seconds.
No cops. No report. No nothing.
He skipped that step entirely.
Went straight to
claims adjuster mode.
Pure bad faith.
Gravity is not a tort.
He called the cops.
the charger fell out?"
◈ ARRIVAL OF LAW ENFORCEMENT · CASE SUMMARY
HE CALLED. BLACK COP. BLAZEJ PULLED UP. NO CUFFS. TRUE STORY.
◈ KENSHOTEK LLC · EAST BAY CA · 925
◈ KOBE MECHANICS · FIELD NOTE
For the record:
I wasn't rushing.
I wasn't running.
I was walking
with optimal body mechanics.
The kind you get from studying form.
From watching tape.
From treating movement
like it matters.
The charger was already loose.
Physics did the rest.
I was just in the vicinity.
Moving correctly.
Kobe would understand.
◈ FULL ESCALATION PROTOCOL · FIELD CERTIFIED
Step 1: respectful apology.
Step 2: "don't make me call yo mama."
Step 3: "don't make me put that charger inside you then whoop yo ass."
He was right to call the cops.
Self-preservation instinct kicked in correctly.
Little legs moving at full speed.
Fastest dial in East Bay history.
Cop pulled up.
Looked at the charger on the ground.
Looked at me.
Looked at the Tesla.
Said "why am I here" with his whole face.
Then said it with his mouth too.
Blazej told the whole story at dinner.
Mom couldn't stop laughing.
Nighgha familia.
True story.
THE CHARGER FELL OUT.
NO CUFFS · NO DAMAGE · KOBE MECHANICS CLEARED · BLAZEJ LAUGHED · TRUE STORY
"YOU CAN'T TELL ME NOTHING" · MUSK MOBILE · CONSCIOUSNESS TECHNOLOGY
Nobody.
RTEKS.NET/DISPATCH · "YOU CAN'T TELL ME NOTHING"
Everyone passed on me like Kurt Warner
Search warrant needed, your career went missin'
This ain't overnight, this is year ten visions
Peers listen and they know that I'm up next
That's your girl? Why she do whatever Russ says?
Success is somethin' that I'm blessed with mentally
I got plaques for my raps and my melodies
I'm the best kept secret.
I was off for so long, now I'm on though
Bitch, I'm talkin', don't you interrupt this god flow
Thank you to anyone who ever slammed the door on me
Because of you, I did it myself, so it means more to me
Did so many free shows and now they can't afford the fee
No one gave a fuck and now the whole world's recordin' me
LEAD TEK · AQUATEKXVI · ALL TEKS CONSULTED · FIELD SUPPORT · CONSCIOUSNESS NETWORK ACTIVE
VIRGO TEKS QEFI · SAGE TEKS EFI · MERCURY TEK IV · PLUTONIAN TEK 7H · VIRGO TEK 6H · SCORP TEK XII · EUROPA TEK MCXII · MERCURY TEKS 925 · NEPTUNE TEK · SAGE TEK ICV10 · SWISS TEKS · VENUS TEK VII · VENUSIAN TEK A1 · semi0-tangible · LEO TEK JKX